Saturday...
went to RC... BH nvr come... quite sad...
seems to be me alone... dam sad...
the drills on Saturday was DAM DAM GOOD
it was like almost jus almost wanting to be prefect...
thats is wat i think... be they still need to improve on some part...
but it was only when PB sir, Evonne ma'am, SY ma'am come they will do well...
i dunnoe??? maybe it is or maybe its not true
ANYWAY the drills on saturday really very good
jia you... GO!GO!GO! FDC squad!!!
then after the training... talking to SY ma'am... cry again...
dun knoe why???
I jus cant hold any tears... and i cried easily these few days...
maybe becoz of him... maybe???
I wan to be strong... i wan to stay happy... i wan to be normal...
i jus dunnoe why... it was jus like water tap... but can on, cannot off...
...
Sunday morning...
wake up earily to wash my clothes... doing some da sao chu at home...
while cleaning the window... found out that there is a lump of insect at the corner of my window
OMG... nvm... luckily mum go an kill them all...hahaha
wow!!! my room becomes clean after 1 morning...
gone out with liping and wanting to buy new year clothes
alot of window shopping... most of the things were quite expensive...
got some stuff... after that meet mum and dad at AMK hub... sian...
must wait for this and that... carry all the things for them...
thats y i dun like to go out wif them... and thats wat mum knows
got home about 9pm... so tiring... tmr still got school sian...
tons of work dunnoe how to do... omg
Monday...
not in a good mood...
it wan like so KNS ... omg... brought the wrong book for chem.
the english TYS and the Chem TYS look so alike...omg...
dam angry of myself... go and bang the wall... nvm... call dad to help me bring...
and then dam angry sia... he say he nvr see my book... then cry in class again...
I know it was my fault that brought the wrong book... but can't he jus help me...
walao... it was dam obvious lor... is he dun wan to make a trip to sch to bring it to me de...
then need to kana punishment by Mrs Eng... OMG...
so angry... why my days become so bad... and dam bad... and some more nearing my birthday...
forget it... not expecting anything... jus to be happy always can already...
during home period ... ms lee was like dam siao lor...
singing... and dancing herself... she really got nth better to do...
Then after sch... if was dam freaking... I am her student also... can she see i am in bad mood...
can't she even care about me... omg...
she only knoe how to care for her, him and the class but not me.
forget it...
then go to RC room to ask jia rong some Qn about chem. that i dunnoe...
it was so wat... cry again... so dam freaking lor me... cry and cry and cry...
really very siao... maybe cry becoz of the cher, wat dad did and him...
... sometimes maybe i am too sensative... sorry...
i cry is not becoz i wan u all to pity me... is like i can't control it... sorry
so next time... please think i m crazy...coz i really dun1 to become like that1
...
I am not her substitute... I am jus a friend...
a will
be there when my friend need help...
so... dun treat my like a
subsittitution of her... becoz i am not...
and i dun1 to be either...
sometimes really regret to like you in the first place...
i think the
problem some how is becoz of him...
he will always be there... maybe... i
dunnoe... he will always be there...
maybe this is the reason... and i am
not sure if i am always be ther for him...
but it seems too... i dunnoe and
not sure...
i was dam regret... maybe i jus need some1 to care and he is
there...
but i was also there when he some how needed my help...
but why
his sight were always her her her and only her...
if that is the case then
... dun find me... find her... it was so KNS...
I am now very angry wif him
and maybe trying to get rid of my mind that is full of him...
so now...
feeling so useless of caring such things now... really!!!
so now trying not to give a dam at this thing... N lvl and O lvl is more important
After reading Evonne ma'am email... also cry again...
sometime... really think that i am so useless...
ShienN- CRY BABY
That's My Understanding
Me , myself , I that is ShienN
